Elisabeth Harris

April 26, 2021, 5:12 a.m.

How to succeed in business without really trying

Elisa was a little delayed making it to class because she was busy yanking her crumpled school robes from her rucksack and shaking them up and down the corridor in an attempt to remove creases without much success. If there was a spell for this sort of thing Elisa had to learn it ASAP because her arm was already starting to ache from the effort. She absolutely loved free periods and was secretly quite scared of Fell so nothing about today's super secret lesson appealed to her.

Rumour had it that the upper years were busy having babies as some sort of birth control which sounded hilarious AND efficient - Elisa had witnessed first hand the strain a baby could put on a relationship - and she could not wait to tease Eugene for having an ugly baby. She just hoped that their class had nothing to do with childcare. Elisa liked babies for about five minutes, after that they got really boring and really smelly. The younger years, it turned out, were going to be building a business which was way cooler than washing bibs all day. Hearing Fell talk so much kind of made him seem more like a normal person and less like a walking bank note and therefore much less frightening.

This lesson was especially exciting for Elisa because her dad was a professional gambler - which was basically like a businessman but on a smaller scale - so Elisa probably had some genetic advantage when it came to business planning. She chewed the top of her pencil waiting to be struck with something so amazing, and so lucrative, her classmates would be falling from their seats in awe. That never happened but she did hit on a few solid plans she thought might be worth sharing. Removing the pencil from her mouth she used it to whack the arm of the person sitting next to her. "Can wizards grow arms in arm laboratories for people without arms? I'm torn between THAT or cat spa - for pampering cats not people."

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An Exercise in Economy (Years 1-3) - Bellamy Fell || April 24
How to succeed in business without really trying - Elisabeth Harris || April 26
Success without work? Count me in! - Paige Blair || May 22